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Why is Jesus so sexy?

Went to see the movie Son Of God. Making a movie about Jesus is difficult due to the possibly of stirring up controversy. Christians, sadly, can often be known more what they protest then for whom they are to represent. However, I fear that the Son of God movie presents a domesticated and distorted Jesus. A Jesus that is more one dimensional than 3-D. The Son of God movie presents a Jesus that avoids the political. A Jesus that does not confront the violence of poverty. A Jesus that is ghostly not bodily. A Jesus that forgives yet tells nobody to repent of sin. While I appreciate the effort, time, money and desire to share the story of Jesus with a wide audience I fear the Son of God movie tells an odd, distorted and unbiblical story.

1.       If I didn’t know much about Jesus I would be confused. The movie presents a disjointed and confusing story. It never gets around to explaining what the message of Jesus was nor how that message connected to the things that Jesus did. Instead the Son of God movie sprinkles quotes and teachings of Jesus here and there. The movie promotes a Jesus who has no clear message nor any real connection to those around him. For example in the movie it captures the moment that Jesus reads from the Isaiah scroll in his home town of Nazareth. The movie simply has Jesus read the passage from Isaiah in a dramatic fashion and then walk away. No connection is made to the passage from Isaiah and the ministry of Jesus. If I did not know much about Jesus and watched this movie I think that I would walk away confused. Just who was Jesus? What was his message?

2.       Jesus is a mind reader, a magician and has some kind of Star Wars Jedi powers.

·         The mind reader - In one of the opening scenes Jesus approaches Peter as he is coming in on his boat from a day of fishing. Jesus wades out into the water and asks Peter to take him fishing. Once in the boat Jesus looks at Peter and calls him by name. From the reaction of Peter you get the idea that the two have never meet before. Jesus must be able to read minds.

·         The Magician - When Peter casts out his net to fish Jesus leans over the boat and stirs the water. There is a sound effect added as Jesus stirs the water to give the impression that Jesus is calling the fish to the net. In another scene involving fish Jesus is feeding the 5,000. He lifts an empty basket into the air and when he brings it back down it is full of fish. Jesus is a magic man that can conjure fish from thin air or get them into your net. Jesus is a magic man.

·         Jesus the Jedi – The movie has Jesus meet Barabbas prior to Jesus’ trial before Pilate. Barabbas questions Jesus about why he is not going to confront the Romans in a military conflict. Instead of giving a meaningful answer to Barabbas question the movie has Jesus reach out his hand and briefly touch Barabbas. There is an added sound effect that gives the impression that Jesus transmitted some kind of information or altered Barabbas’ state of mind because the once infuriated Barabbas quietly walks away. Insert "These are not the droids you are looking for" here.

3.       Why is Jesus sexy? I went to see the movie with my teenage son and one of his friends from high school. When the movie was over I asked them what they thought about the movie. My son’s friend commented “Why is Jesus sexy?” I will have to agree. The movie seems to present Jesus as a guy who probably could have been a top contender for the hottest hottie in the first century. His hair is perfect. His skin complexion is glowing and his beard is well trimmed. One could get the impression that Jesus was the Brad Pitt of Israel. I am not so sure that a guy who walked dirty dirt roads and camped outdoors most days sounds like the kind of fellow who was overly interested in his looks.

4.       Mary Magdalene. It is interesting that the movie adds Mary Magdalene into the inner circle of the twelve. She is featured prominently throughout the movie. The Son of God Mary Magdalene seems to have a better grasp of who Jesus is then any of the other disciples. She is outspoken and presented as a leader of the disciples. Not so sure about that one. Certainty there were women that were followers of Jesus. Certainty the Gospels of the New Testament feature women in prominent roles and so does the Apostle Paul in his writings. However, by adding Mary Magdalene in this manner it seems to give credence to the unfounded claims that Jesus had a wife or at least a gal pal.

All in all the Son of God movie presents a Son of God that the New Testament would not recognize. There is much more that could be added to the list of critiques. The producers of the movie are Roma Downey, who co-produced the film and played Mother Mary, along with husband Mark Burnett who also produced the History Channel’s series The Bible. It makes one really wonder about Downey’s and Burnett’s theology and view of Jesus. More than that it makes me wonder how many Christians will go see the movie and walk away thinking – yep that was Jesus alright.

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